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You know those moments in life where you can either laugh or cry? I have never laughed so hard in my entire life.
While going through DynaGirl’s homework folder, I found this storyboard:
Me: What was this for?
DynaGirl: Oh, that’s just a rough rough draft of something.
Yeah, rough.
…
Rough draft?
Chuck handed me a section of the newspaper the other day and said, “I saved this for you.”
Headline: 2009’s swimsuits accept your imperfections.
Article highlights:
“…moderate shaping to power control…”
“…stomach, rear, and side love-handles…”
“…skin oozes out elsewhere…”
“…popping out…”
“…don’t kid yourself that you can hide it…”
Hrrrmmmm.
Getting ready.
BigHugs: You have a hole in your undies.
Me: I do?
BigHugs: Yeah. I know, Mom! Next time we go to the store we can see if there are other big undies there that are your size. Is that a great idea?
Me: Big undies? Is that what I need?
BigHugs, smiling: Uh-huh.
Harumph!
Bonus thinking person caption.
Thinking person #6
Stop staring at me.
Happy Birthday, Susan!
So the other day I was blog browsing and came across this test over at Mary’s place. You plug in your blog’s URL and it measures your use of profanity and spits out a percentage. According to the cuss-o-meter, my blog is G rated—no cussing. I hate to admit it, but I was slightly disappointed. Here I thought I was all edgy and pushing the envelope of polite conversation. I’ve even been concerned at times that I might offend or corrupt someone, but apparently I’m wholesome. Wholesome! Harumph.
Here it is—proof of my piety:
Just for kicks, I thought I’d test out some of the blogs I frequent to see how they compare to my own wholesomey goodness. And the blogs I frequent, gentle readers, are yours. Yes, yours. There were some interesting results, which I will now publish here. Don’t worry, I’ve kept you anonymous to protect the innocent and the guilty.
Frankly, I was thinking this one was a little low.
I was kind of surprised by this one as I’ve rarely encountered anything I would consider to be off-color.
This one didn’t surprise me at all.
Created by OnePlusYou
I think this one’s a wannabe rebel. Like me. Only a more successful one, obviously, with that half a percent.
So getting back to me, I’m curious if any of you are surprised by my results. Has my word choice ever given you pause? Am I your guilty pleasure? Or am I a regular Pollyanna? Is there no edginess here? Am I completely devoid of edges? This is for posterity, so be honest.
That title actually has nothing whatsoever to do with anything I’m about to ramble on about. I heard it last night on Mythbusters and was totally taken aback as the only other person I can recall ever having said this before is Madhousewife. Where does this come from? Did the blind man driving the car on Mythbusters get it from you, Mad?
At breakfast.
BigHugs: Are you the grossest mom?
Me: Do you think I’m gross?
BigHugs: No.
Me: OK, then no. I guess.
Harumph.
Mr. T has figured out that he can shoot nerf darts out of his nose. He can get about 5 ft out of them.
So surprise, surprise. Mr. T and DynaGirl have decided they want to be hobos for Halloween. I’m not exactly sure how they’re envisioning their costumes, but I’m thinking they can’t be too hard to throw together with stuff I’ve got around the house. I’m pretty much the Halloween scrooge. It’s not that I don’t enjoy the holiday, I mean candy, come on. But I don’t mess with a lot of decorations and I spend as little as possible on my children’s costumes—like next to nothing. Or nothing. I thought I had convinced Goose to recycle her Cinderella costume from two years ago, but of course, once she heard the hobo thing she was conflicted. Chuck so helpfully suggested she go as Hobo Cinderella. You know, Cinderella post-midnight with the raggedy clothes. So now Goose wants me to sew her a Hobo Cinderella costume. I told her I didn’t know how to do that. Then again, Chuck so helpfully suggested we just take the nice Cinderella dress and rip it all up like the evil step sisters do in the cartoon and whalla—Hobo Cinderella. He says these things out loud.
That is all.
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