This is not the party to whom you are speaking

22 Jul

Our family e-mail address is just our last name at internet provider dot net. I’ve never really thought of my last name as being very common, but apparently in certain parts of the country it is because we are forever getting e-mails meant for someone else. And it’s not even always the same someone elses.

Here’s the latest (I’ve “changed” the names to protect the strange strangers):

From: ANGELA CHASE
Sent: Tuesday, July 01, 2008 3:12 PM
To: bythelbs’ last name at internet provider dot net
Subject: 1 ? 2 Me

Christoph asked me outright today, “Has Sis. Bythelbs ever told you anything about Chantella?”
I said, “yes, she told me that she called you when you were on your date with Chantella, and that Chantella texted her with your phone, she told me that she and Chantella have been communicating somehow, and she told me that Chantella’s heart keeps breaking over you, so Sis. Bythelbs suggested that Chantella shouldn’t be always making the calls, and that she should back off for a while and see how long it would take you [Christoph] to realized that you missed her and would call her back.”
He just said, “Oh,” like he was fitting it into his thoughts, but it wasn’t a readable inflection.

I told him later on that I thought that your advice to her was good advice, but it would have been easier if it wasn’t him on the other end.
I told him that mothers do daydream, and I gave him an example of another mother and her daydream for her 7 year old daughter, a person he thought would never do this, but she doesn’t talk about it unless specifically asked, and that it’s just what we do. I told him that I used to have Chantella in my daydreams with him, until I met Kelly and saw a perfect match in looks, and placed her into my dreams, but that if after his mission he finds that he’s in love with Chantella, I think she would make a great wife and mother, but I can’t tell where his heart goes. I told him that I’m glad he’s just friends with them right now, but if he was ever boyfriend/girlfriend with someone, I would like that, too, but that I thought it best not to go there until he’s ready to look for someone to consider marriage with and after his mission, becaue the chances of a girl getting hooked before he returns is pretty great, which is why I wouldn’t want Chantella to wait for him, because I don’t want her to miss her chance, taking the chance on Christoph, because that is also no guarantee that way, either. Then I went into the “I hope you date all the girls that wrote to you three times each, then …,” letting him know that I don’t really expect he’s going to follow my scientific way of dating, but that mom’s dream for our kids. That’s what we do.

So, the main reason I am writing to you is the first paragraph, but I thought you’d like to know the rest, too.

-Daydream Believer

I’m not sure I totally understand what’s going on, but I think I’m feeling sorry for Chantella. I was going to reply to Angela to let her know she had the wrong Sis. Bythelbs, but I’d like to know what Christoph decides and if he breaks poor Chantella’s heart again. Plus I’m kind of diggin’ Angela’s writing.

I can’t tell where his heart goes.

He just said, “Oh,” like he was fitting it into his thoughts, but it wasn’t a readable inflection.

Mom’s dream for our kids. That’s what we do.

That’s literary gold, people.

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11 Responses to “This is not the party to whom you are speaking”

  1. cheryl July 22, 2008 at 5:55 am #

    She’s a good mom, that Angela. Man, I hope she writes you back and tells you what happens with Chantella! It could become a Series, like the Wrong Email Address Series.

    Ooh! Do you have more??

  2. Julie July 22, 2008 at 7:42 am #

    This could outdo Wacky Search Term Wednesday.

  3. Alison Wonderland July 22, 2008 at 7:49 am #

    I think it’s interesting that it’s another sister bythelbs and not just a Mrs. bythelbs. And that you opened email from a name you don’t recognize.

    I’d love it if Christoph ended up being 4. Nothing like looking ahead.

  4. bythelbs July 22, 2008 at 8:14 am #

    All the misdirected Bythelbs’ last name e-mails seem to be from Mormons, so my last name must be Mormonish.

    We use Outlook for our home e-mail and all the e-mails show up in a preview window, so you can see it before you open it up. I actually didn’t notice this one—probably because the subject line looked like spam—but Chuck brought it to my attention.

    If only I could write back and ask some questions! But that would be creepy, right?

  5. Mother of the Wild Boys July 22, 2008 at 9:15 am #

    I vote for you asking questions…inquiring minds want to know!

  6. Susan M July 22, 2008 at 10:10 am #

    Wow, that’s good stuff.

    Almost reminds me of something my crazy uncle would write. You sure she sent it to you accidentally?

  7. cheryl July 22, 2008 at 11:14 am #

    Susan could be right, you know. Perhaps you had a conversation with these people, and you just don’t remember! Mommy brain can have strange affects, you know. You could totally be in cahoots with this Chantella person. Cahoots!

    (Just wanted to say cahoots. It sounds cool.)

  8. bythelbs July 22, 2008 at 2:18 pm #

    I never thought of that, Susan. Hmmm…

    Cahoots does sound cool. I need to be in cahoots with someone just so I have an excuse to use the word any time I want.

  9. flip flop mama July 22, 2008 at 2:25 pm #

    Huh? I need to read that a couple times I think to understand it. I vote for you emailing her back and giving your two cents on the relationship issue 🙂

  10. madhousewife July 23, 2008 at 3:07 pm #

    You need to write back with some more advice. It must be really bad advice. You’re playing with people’s lives, you know.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. You mean this poem, Betty? « By the lbs - September 23, 2008

    […] 23, 2008 in Uncategorized Remember this?  I’ve been pretty disappointed not to have received any further updates on Chantella and […]

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