Wacky Search Term Wednesday—special Chuck Norris birthday edition

11 Mar

This edition of WSTW is dedicated to Mr. Norris in honor of his birthday, which was actually yesterday. OK, maybe I’m a day late, but around our house everyday is like Chuck Norris’ birthday, so you can see how it might have momentarily slipped my mind. (Do you think he’ll buy that? Let’s just keep these belated birthday wishes between us, just in case. Shhhh…)

how many birthdays does Chuck Norris hav(e)—I’m going to go out on a limb here and say AS MANY AS HE WANTS.  I’ve also heard: “Chuck Norris does not age. Every birthday, it’s just another year added to his existence, which sucks for you.”

cowbell chuck norris—Are these seriously available?!  I obviously purchased prematurely.  I’m thinking I may need to pimp out my cowbell.


Or maybe they mean this:


chuck lbs—First of all, Chuck does not disclose his weight.  Probably because he intimidates the crap out of scales.  But here are some other Chuck Norris health and exercise related facts:

When Chuck Norris does a push-up, he goes up and the world goes down.
After a workout, Chuck Norris rubs his muscles down with liquid-hot MAGMA.
Chuck Norris does not lift weights, weights rise before Chuck Norris.

chuck erotica—Dude, I wouldn’t go there if I were you.  Just… No.

ideas on how to celebrate chuck norris b(irthday)—First of all, you’re going to need a kickbutt cake.  Like this one:


Or maybe this one:


(Was this cake really for a 2 year old?)

Then for gifts, might I suggest a classic CN tee:


Paired with an authentic pair of Chuck designed and approved action jeans:


In case you’re having trouble with the fine print, the description reads, “Developed by Chuck Norris for stunt fighting in movies.  These great looking western style jeans have a unique hidden gusset which allows greater movement without binding or ripping.”  A steal at $19.95—you can pick up a pair for the birthday boy (or girl) and yourself!

Happy Birthday, Mr. Norris!  Stay classy!  And actiony!chuck-norris1

And awesome!


12 Responses to “Wacky Search Term Wednesday—special Chuck Norris birthday edition”

  1. cheryl March 11, 2009 at 10:39 am #

    Happy Birthday to the Chuck! As in Norris, not Bythelbs’ hubby. Although I guess he DID have a birthday earlier, so whatever…

    [Notice: I laughed out loud several times during this post.]

  2. Kamilli Vanilli March 11, 2009 at 11:41 am #

    I gotta get me some of them there jeans.

  3. Susan M March 11, 2009 at 11:45 am #

    I love that the first cake was for someone named Mike.

  4. Susan M March 11, 2009 at 11:46 am #

    And I think I need that tshirt.

  5. Mother of the Wild Boys March 11, 2009 at 11:54 am #

    Totally awesome!

  6. Julie March 11, 2009 at 11:59 am #

    Those pants STILL make me laugh hysterically.

    I saw a Chuck Norris facts poster at the Walmart recently and seriously put it in my cart and walked around for a little while before deciding that it would be a pain to ship to you. I bet it would have gotten there on his birthday and that would have been a very Chuck Norriss-y coincidence, indeed, seeing as how I didn’t know it was his birthday. Sorry for backing out now. Again, let’s just keep it to ourselves, okay?

    That t-shirt is outta sight! Totally rockin’! I love it.

  7. Janelle March 11, 2009 at 12:11 pm #

    Julie – Chuck Norris made it into the cart! Its the thought that counts.

    bythelbs – how can I shorten your name for keystroke conservation? lbs looks rude. BTL?

    Super funny post.

  8. bythelbs March 11, 2009 at 12:39 pm #

    Cheryl—I’m hoping my Chuck doesn’t notice that his birthday post was significantly shorter than this one.

    Kamilli—Put them on the birthday list! Maybe they can be part of your movie package. I think they fit with the whole “package” theme. OK, sorry, that was SO wrong.

    Susan—I noticed that, too. Mike has a very thoughtful girlfriend and/or wife. And if I ever see that shirt at my local Target or Walmart, it’s yours, baby!


    Julie—I’m with Janelle, making it into the cart TOTALLY counts. And thanks for the previous link to the action jeans, which is how I knew to look for them. I owe it all to you.

    Janelle—You can shorten it however you like. BTL makes me think of BLTs which are goooood and de-lish. So thumbs up there. Also, lbs doesn’t seem rude to me because those are my initials plus I am lbs of fun, I tell you. Lbs of fun!

  9. madhousewife March 11, 2009 at 3:16 pm #

    This post was 31 flavors of awesome.

  10. flip flop mama March 11, 2009 at 4:40 pm #

    So much Chuck Norris awesomeness. Who knew one man could be so revered. I totally would love to make a Chuck Norris cake for my hubby’s birthday. I would be the best wife ever.

  11. Alison Wonderland March 12, 2009 at 1:32 am #

    So awesome! Happy birthday to Chuck!

    And can I say that I love your love of Chuck. It’s very endearing.


  1. Aj Keňa má svojho Chucka Norrisa | Blog.Pelikan.sk - July 9, 2010

    […] Foto: By the LBS […]

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