Dental appointment highlights

29 Sep

Getting ready for my rubber dam.

Dental Assistant: Do you have any latex allergies or anything like that?

Me: No.

DA: Okey-dokey.  We can get started then.  Oh, and that is a great foil.  My hair was supposed to turn out like that, but it didn’t. 

Yeah, it really didn’t.

 

Here’s a visual of me with my rubber dam:

dental dam

 Did you know they’re now providing protective eyewear and full mustaches?

 

I’ve got my dam on.

DA:  I just got back from a cruise to Alaska.  Have you ever been to Alaska?

Me:  Grunt-grunt.

DA:  It was cold and interesting.

Me:  Grunt.

DA:  Those are cute tennies.

Me:  Grunt grunt.

DA:  Where’d you get them?

Me:  Grunt grunt-grunt.

Grunt grunt grunt $!#&*%? grunt-grunt grunt grunt grunt grunt, grunt $!#&*%? moron!

 

Dr. Mode gets to work.

Dr., to DA:  What have you got over there?  Do you have a cone?

DA:  A what?

Dr., gesturing unintelligibly:  A cone…the cone.

DA, handing her an instrument:  You mean the acorn thingy?

Dr., looking at the instrument:  Yeah, that’s it.

Um, don’t these dental instrument “thingies” have actual names?!?

 

The soundtrack:

America, Neil Diamond
50 Ways to Leave Your Love, Paul Simon
Ebony & Ivory, McCartney & Wonder
something by Whitney
Back in the High Life Again, Steve Winwood
Electricity, Elton John
The Way It Is, Bruce Hornsby
Don’t Wanna Lose You, Gloria Estefan

And a couple others I forgot.

 

The verdict.

Dr. Mode

Dam.

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6 Responses to “Dental appointment highlights”

  1. tawnya September 29, 2009 at 1:54 pm #

    I think that playlist may be more brutal than the root canal…

  2. madhousewife September 29, 2009 at 4:28 pm #

    LOL @ Edna Mode, DDS.

    I hope you don’t need a root canal. 😦

  3. Mother of the Wild Boys September 29, 2009 at 7:33 pm #

    Wow, that dental assistant is so obsessed with you. And I wonder what they do for people with latex allergies? I hate dam latex…er, latex dams.

  4. flip flop mama September 29, 2009 at 10:56 pm #

    What’s the deal with that assistant?? She sure notices hair coloring jobs. Anyway good luck with The dental work hope you don’t need a root canal.

  5. boquinha September 30, 2009 at 5:18 am #

    Wow, it’s like the energy in that office completely shifted. A root canal and a less-than-stellar soundtrack? What gives??

  6. Julie September 30, 2009 at 10:47 am #

    You look smashing in rubber and facial hair.

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